While this top may look super cute, it’s really uncomfortable when you are wearing a strapless bra that is way too small because your breasts are bigger then Mount Everest!
If you think your boobs are big during pregnancy wait until after.. I refuse to purchase a bigger strapless bra because I only have another five months of breastfeeding. For pictures & quick dinners wearing the bra is fine. But if you saw me naked, it’s a little on the frightening side as part of my top breasts are hanging out!

There are so many emotions when you are having a baby… The shivers during labor are scary and you don’t know how it’s humanly possible for anyone to go through this and the contractions become so intense that you are begging for an epidural.. Then you see your little baby you have been carrying for 9 months and forget it all.. Then comes the big thing: breastfeeding and managing two kids!

I breastfed Jake for 6 months and supplemented with formula.. Now with Chloe when I breastfeed, and feel that she’s not satisfied, I have to give her formula. The guilt I have when having to get her formula is out of control and all the while Chase makes fun of me because he doesn’t understand the whole breastfeeding thing. Chloe doesn’t love the taste of the formula so if I could just produce the right amount of milk I would feel better. When breastfeeding you really shouldn’t diet because you need the calories to feed the baby.

So, while I also want to watch what I eat so I can start to fit in my 24 jeans, I can’t. Don’t get my wrong – my jeans definitely zip – but I am not of a fan of the fat hanging off. I’m starting to do pilates next week so that should help with the love handles! I also have to think about everything I eat like will it give her gas – it’s non stop! People say you loose weight but do you really? I am so much hungrier all day!

At the end of the day I’m doing it for Chloe – not for me. It’s a major commitment – coming home every two to three hours. The pressures that come with breastfeeding are so intense so always remember to do what’s right for you. I will say that the connection you feel while breastfeeding is incredible and does make me less stressed out.

I am trying to spend as much time as I can with Jake since I feel like I have lost one year of not going outdoors with him because of Zika. So I am trying to go to the park with him everyday which we are LOVING. I keep giving Jake tasks to do like checking in on Chloe, etc. and it makes him feel like such a great big brother. We decided to potty-train Jake when we arrived home with with Chloe. We figured this would be a good opportunity because we are home for awhile. It’s a work in progress, but it makes it easier not having to deal with diapers for Jake. I feel like every time he has to go I’m breastfeeding – so I of course put her down and rush! It’s been interesting, to say the least.

But after all of this, sometimes I have to pinch myself I feel so lucky to have Chloe and Jake!

xo
Jenny